Abortion Stories

I am trying to talk about this as much as I can. My mom says I have to forgive myself. Which is hard. I had an abortion 4 days ago. Medication abortion. I can't sleep, and I don't eat very much. I have had thoughts that I can't live with myself so I may end my life. I've thought, Why should I live anyway, when the only person in this world whom I was to protect, I destroyed? I couldn't afford to go to the doctor early on so I had been waiting for Medicaid, which still hasn't got here. So when I went to the abortion clinic. That was the first time I had an ultrasound. She adked me "Do you want to see your sonogram?", and I answered "No". She asked me twice, and I answered no both times. I couldn't bring myself to look at it. Now I wish I would have. Maybe seeing my childs newly formed heart beating would've changed my mind. But I was so, so selfish. Only trying to get rid of this 'thing" that this guy had implanted in me. This guy that has made an entire 180 degree change since learning the news. In the beginning he wanted me to get an abortion. I told him no. That it was my baby, and it was a living thing. but I gave in...Pleas, don't give in on your baby. You are the only voice it has. He is helpless, and my baby was. The womb that was supposed to be his dark, warm home. Had turned into his prison. because there was no escaping what was to come for him. My sweet precious baby. I will always love you, and please know form the bottom of my heart. Killing you was the worse decision I could ever make in my life, please forgive me for not standing up for you. For being so selfish, and cold. I would do anything on this green earth to bring you back. But I cannot, and I must live with that every single minute of every hour of every day that I live, forever. i'm sorry.

It has been almost nine months since my abortion. To everyone around me, its been forgotten. Not to me. Its on my mind everyday. When I wake up, when I go to bed. I thought with time it would be easier. I still wonder everyday. What my baby would look like, what it would be. I never really wanted to have an abortion. However, I knew it was the best thing. I could not bring a baby into my life when I cannot provide it the very best life it could have. Now I question if I could ever have another baby. It feels selfish to me to let another baby come into this world someday down the road when my first baby wasnt given the oppertunity. Will it ever get any easier?

I am a 19 year old college student and had an abortion nearly 1 month ago. I was going through serious health issues which had me hospitalized the month before I took a pregnancy test, so naturally I was surprised it was even possible. When I spoke with my boyfriend of one year we both decided abortion was the right decision, but it wasn't until my first ultrasound that I realized how attached I already was to the baby growing inside me. I struggled for weeks and shared the news with my parents who were extremely disappointed/angry with my decisions. This only continued to make my decision tougher even though I knew deep down what I could truly live with. My boyfriend was struggling as well and my indecision did not help him.(I knew he would be there for me no matter what) I finally chose the path of abortion. I was 8 weeks along. I told my family and close friends(excluding my mother)I had a miscarriage, thinking it would help me if they thought that as well as ease their minds because it put great stress on them as well. Now I am struggling with extreme guilt and regret for my actions. I keep wondering if the baby would have been a girl or boy, what he/she would have looked like, and how far along I would be now. I've been trying to keep my self together for both me and the people I care for but it's like a burden on my shoulders getting heavier and heavier. I wish I could go back and change everything. I pray that I will be forgiven for the terrible thing I've done and that maybe one day I will be able to forgive myself as well. I hope this may serve as a warning for someone who is considering abortion, I ignored the stories I'd heard of and now it's the biggest regret of my life.